


Got A Secret Need To Keep It

by BindiTheSkunk



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bilbo Remains In Erebor, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Asshole Thranduil, BAMF Bilbo Baggins, Bamf Thorin Oakenshield, Bilbo Makes Poor Choices, Bilbo is So Done, Consort Bilbo Baggins, Dori Is The Rarity Of the Hobbit Universe, Erebor, F/M, Fíli & Kíli & Thorin Live, Fíli Is a Sweetheart, Fíli and Kíli Are Little Shits, His One is in danger though and he won't allow that, Hurt Bilbo Baggins, King Thorin, Kíli Is a Little Shit, M/M, Mirkwood, Mpreg, Overprotective Thorin, Poor Bilbo, Pregnant Badass, Pregnant Bilbo Baggins, Protective Thorin, Rebuilding Erebor, Sassy Bilbo Baggins, Thorin Is A Dork And We Love Him For It, Thorin is a Softie, Thorin needs to keep his stubborn ass in bed, Thrain Survives, Top Thorin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-08
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:22:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26894401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BindiTheSkunk/pseuds/BindiTheSkunk
Summary: Bilbo tries to do what Thorin told him to with his supposedly dying breaths and return home to his books and armchair...but a sudden revelation makes him go to return to the place his heart was left at, but he is set upon by Mirkwood's elves who wish to use him...
Relationships: Bard The Bowman/Laketown Woman, Bilbo Baggins & Thorin Oakenshield, Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, Dwalin & Nori (Tolkien), Dwalin/Nori (Tolkien), Fíli/Ori (Tolkien), Kíli (Tolkien)/Tauriel (Hobbit Movies)
Comments: 59
Kudos: 289





	1. It's always Gandalf's fault

**Author's Note:**

> Mostly made this because I am SICK of the hobbit-mpreg trope where Bilbo returns to the Shire knowing he is pregnant (sometimes even GIVING BIRTH on the road there!!! )
> 
> (because SUDDENLY he turns coward on us and is scared shitless of Thorin despite them mending fences on the hilltop and Bilbo KNOWING Thorin was SICK and NOT himself )
> 
> Bilbo went to HELP Thorin, he would not do that if he was scared of him, he is NEVER scared of Thorin, he was always scared FOR Thorin! 
> 
> I know both Young-Bilbo from the Hobbit Films and old-Bilbo from Lord of the Rings would slap the SHIT out of fandom-Bilbo for being such a DUMBASS and FRAGILE FLOWER most of the time...I don't mean just having a moment of weakness or reacting normally to trauma, I mean can't FUNCTION without someone else there to drag his ass for the mildest of inconveniences! 
> 
> This is the same hobbit who wagged his finger at ROYALTY, insulted a WIZARD and in old age marched all the way to RIVENDEL and was aiming for EREBOR!

Gandalf when I get my hands on you...

Couldn't the wizard stay around for more than an hour? Might be nice! One of these days he would really let him have it for his inability to stay in one place when with other people! It was unsafe and just plain RUDE!

Bilbo wandered through the pathway in Mirkwood, well not as oppressive as it was before when he and the rest of the company had come in, no doubt thanks to many of the spiders being killed, still was suffocating, the whole place felt sickly, his stomach twisted like it never had before in his life, he wished the wizard did not have another one of his 'errands' to run back in Erebor, saying he would catch up to the hobbit and that Mirkwood was safer now, he just needed to keep on the trail.

It was to note that he did not feel as lightheaded this time around, but his stomach seemed to have taken up the role of being the pain in his bottom this time, perhaps someone had stepped on it well he had been unconscious? Would be just his luck...

Erg...there he was thinking about Thorin again...if he had just woken up sooner...perhaps he could have done something, he would have stayed, in Erebor, if Thorin ...if he...but Thorin had smiled so gently at him...wanting him to return home,Bilbo would give up his hobbit hole, his books, his armchair, everything in it and the fur on his feet if that meant Thorin would have lived...that somehow giving them up would bring Thorin back to him...

The hobbits stomach lurched

Bilbo ran for a tree that was partially on the trail, not about to risk anything like last time and threw up the meager meal he had partaken in before he left, great, not only was he in this horrible place, he was ill on top of it! Gandalf hopefully would return soon with something to ease his stomach...or at the very least leave his hat in reach to where the hobbit could use it as a vomit bucket...

The hobbit tried to stand up but his legs felt like jelly...nothing wrong with taking a small rest he supposed...he was still on the trail after all and he thankfully had not lost Sting in the battle so he had the trusty 'letter opener' strapped to his hip.

Sitting down in a more comfortable position, the hobbit leaned back a bit, closing his eyes and trying to just wish the sick feeling away, the moment of pause seemed to be helping but he could not just sit here and wait for the wizard to come back, that would take heaven knows how long! He had to keep going...

Moving to stand up Bilbo felt something inside him

_ba-bump_

What...that feeling...something ...alive...

 _Ba-Bump_

No, it couldn't be...could it?

Looking down he saw his stomach did in fact look rounded despite how much weight he had lost throughout the trip...at least till...that night..oh goodness...his belly started growing again...he had not thought anything of it! Just thought the food they had brought from Beorn's was causing the weight gain!

Bilbo went scarlet, he really should have known better! Warned Thorin at the very least! 

But Thorin had been so sweet...said he was his One...he had felt the connection too...

Thorin had been his destined, so they had ended up skipping a few steps of courtship in the heat of the moment...oh of all things to happen! He could not travel like this! Even with Gandalf to help him, he highly doubted the wizard knew anything about babies! Bilbo himself knew very little about them outside of they enjoyed stories and chewing on hair!

Oin was a healer and a midwife though...he had even delivered his brother's son, he would help...

His friends would be surprised for sure...but happy that a small part of their leader was going to live on, Bilbo was happy for this also, it was a shock for sure, but a good one.

He just had to turn around and head back, would not take more than an hour, at least he emptied his stomach now so he would not puke on someone! Pregnant or no he highly doubted that would be taken lightly!

Finding his strength and standing up Bilbo felt something was watching him and unsheathed Sting, it was not glowing, but that did not mean danger was not lurking around in the dark...

Something brushed passed his ear 

"I would sheath that dagger if I were you" came a soft voice and Bilbo soon found himself with an eyeful of an arrowhead as a brunette elf pointed the weapon at his face.

"What is the meaning of this?" Bilbo tried to keep his voice steady as was possible when staring down a sharp weapon and slowly did as he was told, putting Sting back in its holder knowing better than trying to fight this elf, where there was one, there was bound to be at least a few more and he had to think about more than just his own life at that moment.

"King Thranduil wishes to speak to you, there are things he is still owed and he feels you can help get them for him" the elf spoke and without so much as a warning poked the hobbit in the back with the arrow to force him to start walking, rude!

Perhaps this could work in his favor though...

"If you take me back to the mountain I can speak with Dain about-" Bilbo started only to be glared at.

"I think not, I won't be overrun by filthy dwarves the moment you give the order!" was the cold interruption.

"Excuse me? Just what kind of power do you think I have? I'm just a hobbit" Bilbo said, trying to soothe the obvious anger the elf had, He might have loved Thorin, who would have been king under the mountain and had the feeling be mutual but that did not mean DAIN owed him anything! And he would not order his friends to risk themselves!

"The one called Thorin Oakensheild lives, the king under the mountain....his nephews as well, our king knows you two are soul bonded that makes you-"

Anything else the elf said fell on deaf ears

Thorin and the boys were alive?!

Bilbo could feel hot tears start to build up in his eyes at the news, part of him wanted to remain skeptical, but what reason would the elf have to lie? He was just a guard, he had nothing to gain from lying to the hobbit.

Bilbo wanted to do a dance that would make Bofur jealous! 

Thorin would be so happy to learn about the baby, Fili and Kili too would love the idea of having a baby cousin to play with and spoil rotten with candy and tricks, he just had to explain things to the Elvenking and everything would be fine, he would send Bilbo right back to Thorin...

Or would he?

Just as quickly as the euphoria came, it disappeared like a rabbit down a hole at the idea of the elf king learning about the half-dwarf baby inside him, his helpless half-dwarf baby...

The working together during a battle where both sides hated the third party involved was one thing, especially since they were more than ready to kill each other a few minutes before the dark forces showed up... learning you had an unborn heir to Erebor, even one that most likely would never sit on the throne, in your kingdom, would possibly make anyone act rashly, Thranduil was not lord Elrond, he was angry, just as spiteful as Thorin could be, holding a grudge like no ones business and well Thorin had his nephews with him to temper the anger, apparently, the Elvenking's son had left for parts unknown after the battle, that was bound to have put him in a less than pleasant mood...

He had lost his wife and now his son...that might make him less inclined to let Thorin keep his own partner and child...no, Bilbo would keep his mouth shut for now, till he learned exactly what was going on.  
\---

"The Thief In The Shadows and Consort to the King Under The Mountain..." Thranduil said as he paced around the hobbit, making him feel even smaller than he already was, Bilbo trying to use his Laketown cape to cover his bump, hoping to the Elvenking he would just appear chilled instead of hiding something, Sting had already been taken from him and set on a nearby table, he did not want to be searched for weapons he did not have just for fiddling with his cloak!

"I think consort is a bit of a strong word...we are not married and I'm just-"

"Don't try to brush my words off halfling, I know the one thing Dwarves take just as seriously as their gold, is their other half, the one they say was forged for them from a split part of their very soul, my lookouts say he asked for you the moment he awoke from his healing slumber and even that he tried to remove himself from his bed to look for you" Thranduil gave a condescending smile and Bilbo would have liked nothing more than to knock that glass of wine out of the Elvenking's hands and spill it all over that tacky robe of his!

Though his heart warmed at the thought of Thorin being concerned for him, his words on the hill had been true...he did forgive him for taking the stone...wanted him to find happiness ...

"So you want me to go to Thorin and ask him to give you a specific jewelry piece?" Bilbo asked, already hating gems and gold more than he already did and how they could make those who wanted them insane from the desire to possess them...like a dragon in smooth flesh...

"That, and I want something else as well, nothing you have to worry about, though I do wish for you to pay for your own part in things...freeing prisoners and stealing...you won't be harmed, don't worry, but you won't be leaving for a while, take him to one of the rooms Logon and make sure he stays there...treat him well though, he is a royal guest..." Thranduil turned away to sit on his throne.

The elf, now known as Logon, grabbed Bilbo by his shoulders, despite how much he had to bend doing so and pushed Bilbo down a hallway despite the hobbit's protests.

"N-Now wait just a minute! This is very much uncalled for and I will not stand for this!" Bilbo shouted back towards the throne room, struggling as he was shoved around like a doll, not caring who heard him, he would scream this whole tree down if he had to! Break everything in sight as well! He wished he had not given that fancy ring to Gandalf now...

"Quiet" was the only response he got from his jailer before he was rather forcefully shoved into a bedroom and the door slammed behind him and locked.

Bilbo was now alone 

Sort of

And he had no idea what was in store for him, or what might happen if his pregnancy was found out by the other...he had a little one resting under his heart and was the prisoner of someone who bore a severe grudge against the dwarf he loved deeply and needed to return to.

Oh, what would he do now?

Sitting down on the bed using the provided stepstool, Bilbo wrapped the cape more around himself for comfort and started to think. 

"I got thirteen unruly dwarves out of this place, I can get the two of us out..."


	2. Same attempt, different result

Bilbo looked around the room to see if he could find anything to aid in his escape, not much leaped out at him though...

The room was fanciful, like any elvish room, a lot of posh nature-themed furniture that was too loud for the hobbit's personal taste, no clothing was in the closets, not that they would have had anything that would fit him anyway, a few shampoo's and oils were in the bathroom, suppose they did not like the idea of a prisoner smelling up one of the rooms and not wanting to deal with the consequences of putting a 'consort' in the dungeon, or just an attempt to make Bilbo behave himself by giving him a nice room since they had put an actual king in the cells...

The sheets could be used perhaps...if he could at least get out of this room...

Plan set in motion, Bilbo got to work tearing the sheets, pillowcases and fitted sheet off the bed, ripping up the material to make a long, sturdy rope, feeling a little smug that he was getting his rude host back for his actions and happy that Thorin would get great glee hearing about his destruction of Thranduil's property 

He would blame the smug joy on hormones...and the fact the baby's sire hated elves, already a daddy's boy or girl ...

It was a bit nauseating looking down from his room and seeing how far of a drop it was, but his mind was made up, he refused to be used like a mop, wiped across the floor and shoved into a random space till someone needed to clean up a mess! 

Throwing the makeshift rope down after tying it to the bedpost, the hobbit started his descent and thankful that his small size was not putting too much strain on the sheet-rope, soon hard ground touched his toes and he was able to enjoy being on something solid again, now to find the cellar again...

The ride down the river would be just as nasty as it was last time, only he would be IN a barrel this round, not just clinging to the side getting fish water in his mouth, he had already done the first one well pregnant... though he had not known it at the time...

All he would have to do was ride down the river into the main source, perhaps he might even be able to float into the ruins of Laketown, if it came down to it he could ask Bard for a spot to sleep in Dale if he could not make it before night fell to the mountain, the dragon slayer would not give him up to the elvenking, not after he explained what happened between them, Bard was a father and a good man, he would not be happy with the idea of a baby being drug into a squabble over a necklace of all things and some unspecified want.

Lets see now...

The Elvenking's home twisted and turned like a maze, Bilbo found the throne room again, thankfully with no king in the seat, seeing Sting was still on the table he grabbed it and began his wandering again, the dagger would be needed if he came across anything once he got out of the barrel onto the shores, Bilbo having to make great use of the many covered tables and large decorations to hide under or behind to avoid passing elves, he went further down and even further into the depths, finding the very familiar sight of the dungeons from which he freed the dwarves, the cellar was just a little further on...

Shouts of alarm drew his attention

"The halfling has escaped!"

"Search everywhere! He could be anywhere!"

"Go to the cellar! That is where him and those dwarves escaped before!"

Oh no...

He needed to move fast! 

Bilbo raced down the steps, dropping his cape behind him as he went, hoping it would provide some sort of obstacle for his pursuers on the way down

More barrels had been stacked, less than last time but it was not like it mattered when it was just him and someone who was more than capable of sharing the same space 

Taking off his belt, the hobbit looped it around the lever that would drop the barrels into the water and climbed into the nearest one from the switch, keeping the other end of the strap in his hand, now he just had to pull...

"Stop! Halt!" An elf guard shouted as he tried to reach the barrels

Bilbo pulled the belt hard and the floor fell out from under him, sending the hobbit into a spin as his barrel smashed into the waters below, water pouring into the barrel but thankfully not sinking and with a bit of effort from the hobbit was put to rights as he started to move towards the gate.

Wait...he had forgotten the mini waterfall!!!! 

Water crashed and swirled around as the barrel spun around dizzily, Bilbo's head and stomach revolting against this motion 

Don't throw up...don't throw up....

The clanking of chains hit his ears

Oh no not again!

The gates closed on his barrel as he ducked further down into it to avoid a long arm reaching for his jacket, this could not be happening to him! This was some sort of dream...

But it was real 

"Get over here you little rat!" the elf hissed, pulling Bilbo up who nearly choked as he was dragged upwards by his shirt collar where he began swinging Sting at the offender, not really wanting to hurt the elf, but not knowing what else to do. 

Sting was once again taken from his grasp by another elf and he was roughly dragged back inside...

\---

"Is this really necessary!?" Bilbo shouted as he tugged on the shackle attached to his foot which had been bolted to the wall behind the bed, it was a long chain which would allow him to wander the room freely to the window, bathroom and of course the bed, but it would prevent him from actually going anyplace else...

"You made it necessary Halfling, another trick like that, and I will collar you like a beast and not allow you a moments privacy" Logon said as he checked the chain "Your dinner will be brought to you in an hour, your lucky you are getting to eat at all after your stunt, but the king wants you healthy" 

"When is he going to return me to my dwarves?" Bilbo asked standing as tall as he could, he would not show his sorrow at not being able to return to Thorin....he would be strong, he had to be.

"He is putting together his list of demands now, he wants to wait a week, to make sure Thorin Oakensheild misses you terribly, he will give in to what our king wants easier that way ... it will be amusing to see that prideful dwarf brought down" Logon smirked and left the room.

Bilbo would have thrown something at him if he had anything to throw 

So the cellar was out as an option to him

What could he do now?

_Ba-bump_

"Now, now, don't worry, we will be alright...I did not face a dragon to be outsmarted by a elf who smells of burnt scones and cheese!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short chapter...but hopefully a good one
> 
> What is Bilbo going to do now?


	3. A Desperate Move

"YOU LEFT HIM BEHIND IN THE ELVES DOMAIN!? ALONE?!" Thorin roared as his wounded body was held down by Dwalin as he tried to rise from the sheets to introduce the wizard to his fists! 

The wizard knew how dangerous that place was!

"Bilbo is a grown hobbit if you remember, he is quiet capable of taking care of himself...and listening when someone says stay on the trail" the wizard mumbled that last part "I was not sure if the magical influx is what I thought it was, so I told him to move on, I can catch up with him easily and bring him back here, I'm sure he will be elated to find out you and your nephews live on"

Thorin simmered down hearing that, though he still wanted to spit in the wizards hat...

His One was indeed a full-grown adult and a warrior now in his own right, but that did not mean he was at no risk of danger when elves were involved, the trail offered little protection against those who owned it in the first place and was now on his way back to the Shire...

Thorin had truly thought he and his nephews would die...telling Bilbo to go home was what he thought the hobbit would want, to return to safety and comfort, now that he thought about it, he saw the spark in the others eyes...the taste of adventure, asking the other to return to that stagnant existence was the worst advice Thorin could have given him in those would have been final moments...

He would remedy that when the other was in his arms again, they would be able to work on repairing Erebor together, he would ask Bilbo his opinion on things, what they could improve on, his company had built walls and broke them down in short hours, what a large group of his people returning home could do! 

Bilbo could SEE the dwarves might in building and restoring! Show his own ability to command a room and get the returning Ereborians used to him, they would be seeing a whole lot of the hobbit after all...

Thorin could legitimately build again...make his home even greater than before, for the first time in so many years, he had the ability to truly help his people and others, to feed, clothe and care for those who had spent so long wandering and being lost, it made him giddy, he wanted his One there with him, to share in his joy. 

Dori would drool at the idea of making royal robes, working with materials and baubles he had only dreamed of before, Bilbo might not want them very fancy, but perhaps Thorin could convince him to allow Dori to have his fun on a court tunic for him.

Bilbo would get plenty of adventure, dwarves always had something going on, they would be able to explore the mountain, find new sights. 

Fili and Kili would no doubt try and drag their new uncle into trouble, not that they had not done this already, trolls anyone? But at least now they could have guards keeping a close eye on them, prevent TOO much damage ...and he knew Bilbo would let them know when he was done with the antics.

Thorin's thoughts, oddly enough, went to children ...suppose new life would fill the mountain once again...though he did feel like there was something else going on...something in the back of his mind was saying...he needed to find Bilbo...something was wrong...

Perhaps he was just feeling the others discomfort of being in Mirkwood through their bond? It would grow stronger as time past and they spent more time together, for now it was just little bits and pieces of feeling what they felt, or telling Thorin what Bilbo felt, since the bond had weakened with the ...incident...

Wonder what Bilbo would think of the idea that some male dwarves could have children! Thorin himself had gotten great amusement out of it when he first found out, he would never have to be concerned about it himself though, he was confirmed as a hundred percent male, though he did know some members of the company had that type of equipment, he never thought it polite to ask just how much, that was their and their Ones business. 

If he and Bilbo ever decided to ...surrogacy was always a good option or they might find a child that needed a proper home, he did notice the hobbit had...certain parts, but his One might have no interest in carrying, so Thorin would let the other know he was open to other options if they wanted children.

They had a lot to talk about when his burglar was brought home ...perhaps Bilbo would allow Thorin to dress him up? He wanted his one to look nice for their official statement of him being the future prince Consort of Erebor.

erg...Bilbo was ...he needed to find him...

Now...

\---

"Eat" 

Was the blunt order as some food was placed on a table next to the bed, some green leaves and a few fruits on a platter, a knife and fork provided on it, no doubt wanting to avoid the hobbit eating with his hands and as a result getting berry stains on everything. 

Though considering that might just happen regardless of the provided eating utensils 

Logon left the room in a swirl of his robes without so much as a good evening, shutting and locking the door despite the chain preventing his prisoner from going anywhere else.

Bilbo moved the table closer to himself and picked up the fork and knife, suppose he should eat now, he needed to keep his energy up...

Slowly eating he thought some more, the chain around his ankle clinking against the bedframe as if reminding him of just how trapped he was, Bilbo had been given a knife, he could use it against Logon since Sting had been stolen and he was not sure if it would be returned even if he waited the week out...not to mention any other plans that they had for Thorin...would they ask the king under the mountain to trade himself for Bilbo? To finish out the 'sentence' the elvenking had planned to give him when they first arrived?

It made Bilbo's stomach twist at the thought

Using the knife against his captors was tempting, but it did nothing about the shackle, he would still be trapped and now with a wounded and very angry elf to deal with, it was not worth the risk, Logon could attack him in a rage, kick at his stomach...or even just kill Bilbo all together.

Thranduil might want him alive, but that did not mean he would consider it necessary if he was given too much trouble

Like one of his guards being stabbed...

What other options did he have? He could not slip his large hobbity feet out of the shackle no matter how much oil he poured onto it, he could try picking the lock...

Looking it over he saw there was no keyhole, strange, there was a seam for it to open, but no place for a key...

It must have been sealed using elvish sorcery or some was used to hide the keyhole, just great. 

Or ...

Could he...perhaps...

It would be a sick thing to do...to do that to himself...but ...it would give the elves a reason to remove the shackle...it would hurt badly, but he would be able to slip free and run as best he could, hide if need be

He just had to steel his nerves ... 

Bilbo took a harsh breath, and cut into his foot, spreading blood across the white sheets, it was not too deep, but it bled freely, the Shireling wanted to hold a cloth to the wound to stop the flow, but that would prevent his plan from seeing fruit...

Lets see if elves really do have super senses...if not he could always just shout out 

The door burst open after perhaps three minutes, thank goodness! 

"Foolish creature what have you DONE to yourself?!" Logon shouted as he rushed forward to examine the wound, cursing, he mumbling something in elvish, the shackle popping open and Bilbo was dragged upwards by his arm, feeling like his shoulder would dislocate from the harsh movement.

Now was his chance, he had to take it ...

The hobbit swung his good foot upwards and slammed it as hard as he could into the elf's groin

Logon screamed and dropped the hobbit to the floor nearly knocking the breath out of Bilbo, but he was happy to be loose!

Scrambling to his feet and ignoring the jolt of pain that went up his leg at this action, Bilbo ran as fast as was possible with a wounded foot ignoring the elvish shout for help behind him, knowing more guards would arrive momentarily. 

Ducking under another table, Bilbo removed his necktie, it was not going to be the best bandage, but it would at least keep him from leaving a blood trail right to where he happened to be in that moment and wrapped the dirty cloth around his leg, wincing as he tied it, hoping he could make it to the mountain and have it properly treated before infection could settle into the injury, that would mean no good for either of them...

He just had to find his way to the gates...back onto the trail, or find the river again and follow that...

A low voice started to speak 

"Now I know why Oakensheild chose you, your just as stubborn as any dwarf...I'm patient but even I am growing tired of your behavior..." Thranduil spoke in his same bored tone, but it had a hint of annoyance in it, not good. 

The table cloth was yanked off, exposing Bilbo's hiding spot 

Bilbo started to crawl away only to once again have his arm grabbed like he was a child caught stealing a pie making him struggle against the iron grip.

"Stop your squirming...I have been very fair with you despite all this trouble and I-hm?" 

Wait, what was he-!? 

Long fingers gently felt around the hobbits belly, taking note of the hard curve and the obvious second energy that surrounded the small form...

 _Ba-bump ba-bump_

"You have another life inside you, the child of the king under the mountain..." 

The exact opposite of what Bilbo wanted to happen, happened...the elvenking knew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bilbo is in TROUBLE now! 
> 
> Ps: any stories where Thorin DOES accept Thranduil's offer of help? I'm curious
> 
> if there are none I might make one if I get the itch


	4. Try to Sting Me, I'll Sting You

"I would much rather Oin did this, thank you!" Bilbo shouted as he slapped at the hands attempting to touch him, he had been dragged into another room and held down till an apparent Elvish midwife came in and started to try and examine the hobbit who was having none of it.

"Just behave yourself and pray you have not harmed your child with your insane actions" the midwife said as she tried to do some spell to check well another elf wrapped bandages around Bilbo's leg to help with the cut there.

"My child is fine! As long as we can get out of here!" Bilbo kicked at the other elf, he knew he was behaving horribly, but he had enough of all of this! 

He wanted his Thorin! 

"You will be getting out of here, I will have the dwarf king summoned here this day, now be quiet and be still" Thranduil had not left the room, he had been gentler than Logon with Bilbo when taking him to the infirmary, no doubt thanks to learning about the smaller creatures condition. 

Bilbo tried to calm down and allowed himself to be looked over, trying to think about his soulmate.

Thorin would still be hurt when he arrived there...these elves were just as Beorn said, less wise and more dangerous than their kin, but did that mean they would try and harm the already injured king? Or would they just take the necklace and leave? He hoped it was the latter...

\---

"Picking at your bandages will not bring our hobbit to us any faster" Balin said bluntly as he noticed Thorin was prodding at the gauze above his eye. 

"I am not picking" Thorin did stop and put his hands down on the sheets where they started tapping at the material, wanting to do SOMETHING...

"Sire, a letter has come for you" a messenger said as they presented the king under the mountain with a piece of paper that made Thorin's nose curl at the smell of the parchment, elves...what did they want? 

Thorin took the letter after thanking the messenger and opened it to read and went perfectly still at what he read …

"What is it Thorin?" Balin asked already leaning back away from the bed …

Thorin exploded 

"I'LL KILL HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" 

\---

"Seems your about a month along" 

"I could have told you that..."

"No wonder the dwarf king picked you...would you like to know what you are having?" The elf droned out as she finally took her hands off of the hobbit who was fighting down the urge to ask to go scrub himself 

He was picking up on Thorin's elf-thing...Not that he did not get it now...

"I suppose..." Bilbo said, guessing that it would be good to know what he was having so they could prepare properly for the arrival. 

"You can look forward to a daughter" 

Bilbo could not fight down the smile, hobbit's usually had girls, yes, but Thorin informed him that dwarves rarely ever got blessed with a female pebble, that it had been a joyous occasion when his sister Dis had been born healthy and even popped him in the nose when he got to close for her comfort. 

He said his grandmother laughed so hard at the sight ale came out her nose....what had been her name? 

Thora...hmm...

He liked that name...

"Let's get you cleaned up so your dwarf will see we have been treating you and your little one well, I want it told immediately that you put that cut there yourself" 

\---

"Thorin you can't go! You are still severely injured! Your going to pop your stitches then what will you do!? In elvish territory!" Oin scolded as he tried to grab at the dwarf king who was already moving around the stables, the requested jewels already in a saddle bag attached to his pony. 

"They have the other half of my soul, our burglar, as a prisoner, I almost ended up losing him more than I wish to remember because of my lack of proper action...because I- well not anymore! I'm going to do what I should have done before! I will follow the letter...alone...bring Bilbo back and I want you to be ready in case he has been hurt, I know he would not take being captured laying down, he would fight" Thorin climbed up onto the pony, ignoring the way his injuries screamed at him, he was healed enough to do this! 

Oin nodded and went inside to prepare the infirmary for two stubborn rockheads 

\---

Bilbo looked like an idiot

The green tunic they gave him was about five sizes too big and was obviously chopped short in places so it did not completely consume him, dark pants getting the same treatment, he felt like a child trying on an adults clothing, it was humiliating, but that might have been the point...

After he had dressed, thankfully being allowed to do so in privacy, he was taken to the front gates, a grip on his shoulder, Bilbo was glad to see Sting was in a guards hands, so it was going to be returned... 

The clopping of hooves was heard

Bilbo wanted to cry seeing Thorin coming up the pathway, he looked pale and bruised, but he was ALIVE, the hobbit would have run to the dwarf if the grip on his shirt was not holding him back.

Thorin straightened in his saddle seeing Bilbo, he was white as a sheet and had a bandage around the bottom half of his leg, the king under the mountain took a deep breath and started to speak as clearly as he could removing the saddlebag and opening it so he could remove the necklace and hold it up for all to see "I have brought what was requested! Let him go now! He has nothing to do with this!" 

"Step down from your mount and walk over with the bag in hand, no weapons on your person" a guard ordered as Thranduil was handed Sting by the other making Bilbo nervous

What was going on? 

The king under the mountain slid off of the pony, bag in his hands and stepped forward, holding out the bag.

It was snatched from his hands the moment he got close enough to a guard 

"There is something else we need you to do Oakensheild..." 

Thorin's eyebrow raised as he was handed Sting, the little dagger his One wielded light in his hands, but undoubtedly sharp and dangerous to those on the other end of it. 

Thranduil smiled "Your pride has led to a lot of problems dwarf, I want to make sure you have truly learned your lesson..." 

If looks could kill, the elvenking would have been dead ten times over, at the glare both Thorin and Bilbo were sending him.

"I want you to take your lovers dagger, and shear off the locks your kind hold so much pride in" 

Bilbo went even paler, he could not...that was...all these elves wanted to watch as Thorin cut off his locks bit by bit...to savor seeing him suffer in cutting his warrior braids...

No one expected what happened next

Sting swung upwards so fast they almost did not see it as the dwarf grabbed the back of his hair and in one swipe, cleaved through the locks, all without breaking eye contact with Thranduil, who's smug smirk had disappeared right off of his face.

Thorin lowered the dagger, his hair a mess from the sloppily done haircut, his once long hair now in a pile at his feet 

"Now, return my consort to me" Thorin said, calmly and without pause. 

The elf holding Bilbo dropped his arms to his sides in shock, freeing the hobbit who launched himself forward and into Thorin's arms. 

Thorin gave his warm chuckle, wrapping his arms around Bilbo like he had done back at the carrock so many weeks back

"let's go home Amrâlimê ..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> found out how far along he is 
> 
> that little ba-bump he was "feeling" was not kicking (not exactly) it was energy (hobbits I think would know their pregnant from almost the get-go earthy creatures and all that) Bilbo just did not get the memo till he was a month in because... Smaug...getting chased by orcs ...barrel ride...BOFA ....not leaving a lot of room for reading I'm-having-a-baby signals 
> 
> And no Frodo in this verse (at least as their baby personally) just Thora 
> 
> It also annoys me when I read fics where Thorin is UNHAPPY with the idea of a girl 
> 
> girls are rare for dwarves, he would be HAPPY! 
> 
> He already has an heir in Fili anyway and most likely would love the idea of someone who he could dress up and gift jewelry since Bilbo is not one for being decorated


	5. New Start

Thorin would have laughed at the still-dumbstruck look the elves were giving, as if their brains still could not register what had happened a few minutes ago, yes a dwarf took great pride in having long hair and lots of braids, a signal he was a fighter, but family mattered more, his hair would grow back, his One would not. 

"It's alright, Thorin, I can lift myself up" Bilbo soothed as he felt the dwarf's hands on his waist, ready to lift him up onto the pony, he did not want the other to strain his injuries any more than he most likely had already.

Plus Bilbo had to preserve his own dignity

Soon both were up on the pony, the mount offering no complaint to the extra weight, strong and stubborn like the one who owned it. 

The hobbit leaned back into Thorin's chest, to hear his heartbeat, Bilbo himself was still reeling a bit from the king's actions, to do that, for him, just made him love Thorin more if that even was possible.

It also warmed his heart to know that the king under the mountain was for a fact, truly freed from his Dragon Sickness.

Soon they exited the forest and both smiled seeing the mountain in sight, now away from peering eyes and on their way home.

Oh! 

"Thorin! Wait a moment, stop the pony!" 

The ride stopped 

"What is it?" Thorin asked a bit concerned at the tone in his One's voice 

"There is something I want to tell you...here, before anyone else" Bilbo's voice now had a smile in it that made the dwarf kings head tilt a bit.

The king under the mountain felt his hands being taken from the reins, the horse taking this chance to munch on some clean grass.

They were placed on Bilbo's belly 

What was the hobbit...

 _Ba-bump_

That was...a pulse of energy? From...oh...

Bilbo smiled watching Thorin's face slowly register what he felt under his hands, the hobbit had to shift his own energy a bit to give their fauntling a bit of help in giving off a wave of energy that their father would be able to feel himself.

Thorin's eyes where focused on the rounded belly, mouth partially open as he recovered from the shock from feeling the pulse of energy under his fingers, the feeling of life...

"Y-you...are ...with child?" Thorin said, almost shyly as a small smile spread across his face like sunshine across the mountainside. 

Bilbo nodded "I felt the pulse when I was walking through the Mirkwood...I wanted to turn right around and march right back up to the mountain! Even thinking you ...you know, I knew it would be wrong to keep the baby from the others, plus I was not about to go prancing about the trails and forests well pregnant! I highly doubt Gandalf would make the best midwife! If he was even around when the birth occurred! Not to mention all the nonsense I would have to deal with when I got home and all of the Shire could poke and prod at what happened..." 

Thorin paled at the thought of his One delivering on the road 

Than another thought struck him

"Our trip took seven months...here...should take only that long back ...if not shorter..." Thorin did his best to try and remember just how long each adventure took...his mind was still frazzled from worrying about his One and the little freak show back in the elf kingdom...

"Hobbit pregnancies only last about seven months and I'm already a month along" Bilbo confirmed 

"So short?" Thorin said before he could think better of it, most likely would not feel short to Bilbo! 

The ex-Shireling just nodded knowing dwarf pregnancies took a year, but even then it would have been foolish to risk the journey, especially if he ran into that thing from the tunnels again...riddles would not be able to save him if that happened again...oh that felt GOOD....

Thorin was rubbing his Ones back, remembering his mothers complaints of a sore back when having both Frerin and Dis, even if Bilbo was not far enough along to suffer this just yet, it was still a show of love for his burglar. 

The pony seemed to grow bored with the little love-show on its back and started to move against his riders wishes making both shout out in alarm.

"NICE PONY! SLOW DOWN!!!" 

\--

"UNCLE YOUR HAIR!!!" 

"What did they DO to you!?" 

"I did this to myself...."

"WWWWWWWWHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?" 

"It was part of the deal to free me, I was horrified myself" Bilbo said only to have all eyes turn to him. 

"BILBO!!' 

Oh dear...

The hobbit could not help but laugh as he was swamped by dwarves who pulled on his arms, patted his curls and even picked him up! 

"Careful please!" Bilbo warned, feeling his stomach start to twist at the harsh movements.

"What is it?" Bofur asked 

"I'll tell you all inside, Thorin and I both will..." Bilbo said as he took Thorin's hand to lead him inside and to save him from a clucking Dori. 

\---

Once everyone in the company was sitting down and not looking ready to march their way to Mirkwood to chop off Thranduil's locks in retaliation for their leaders attempted humiliation, Thorin and Bilbo walked to the front of the room and everyone's eyes turned to them.

"We have some very good news... you want to say it or should I?" Thorin was grinning, trying very hard not to blurt it out.

"I think together is good" 

All of the company was on the edge of their seats 

"We're having a baby!" 

The stampede of dwarves should have been expected, as should the belly pats and rubs...

"We even know what we are having since the elvish healer-" Bilbo started only to get an unamused look on his face when shouts started up again

"They TOUCHED your belly before we did!?" 

"How dare they poke and prod at our burglar!" 

"QUIET!!!!!" Bilbo almost screamed which seemed to work as everyone went to sit down again looking sheepish.

"We are having a girl" Thorin said helpfully before leading Bilbo back over to the table to sit down, he of course would have to deal with the little...incident with the elvenking, but for now, he would bask in the joy he felt at having his One back with him and knowing he would be a father in a few short months....

Bilbo leaned back in his seat and patted his stomach, this was a crazy family his and Thorin's baby would be brought into, but at least their daughter would never be without an adventure...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, but I thought this would be a good spot to end it...

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like this chapter and if you have any thoughts, questions or ideas for this or a future story leave a comment down below! ^^


End file.
